Find Emotional Freedom from Worry. Skype Video Online Counselling and Therapy for Worry
Are you one of life's worriers?
Do you worry about your job?
Do you worry about your family?
Do you worry about your finances?
Worry, worry, worry, worry, all day long.
Do you like the buzz of adrenalin that worry gives you?
Worried about your test results?
Worried about your interview?
Worried by the uncertainty of it all?
Many of us think that worrying about a problem helps us sort out the problem. It forces us to focus on the problem, and therefore, it is logical to assume, that focusing on a problem will miraculously bring forth a solution.
Actually, the opposite is true! Think about it for a moment. When was the last time you actually solved a problem while in the chemically induced, panicky, stressed out state of worry? Yes, that's right, never. It's not until you become overly frustrated with worry, exhausted by worry, saddened and lethargic by worry, that your mind switches off, and you relax, and at that precise moment, the solution pops into your head.
So which was the key? Was the original worrying the key? Was it the fact that you worried, became exhausted and couldn't worry any longer the key? Or was it a case of time spent, therefore dues paid, a solution had to be the payback? None of these was the key. It was the moment you relaxed. That was the key that unlocked your mental ability to solve the problem. So relaxation is the key!
Worry, by itself, never solves anything. It satisfies an internal need for due diligence. We have to feel we have done everything we can, either to solve the problem, to force a change in our circumstances (the outcome of a test result perhaps), and worry gives us a sense of satisfaction that we are doing something, even when we are, in reality, helpless to change anything. Worry tricks us into believing we can be in control.
Does this mean I should aim toward NEVER worrying about anything?
Not at all. We all need to have reasonable 'fear'. All anxiety and worry is actually a 'fear' of something. And, on occasion, in the short term this can also create positive action and the energy to succeed. You can have a burst of creativity. But it is a chemical response, and not one that can be sustained. Once the exhaustion sets in, the creativity stops.
However, that's good, because once you have a new track record of solving problems you will have less reason to worry. You will be more able to relax when confronted with problems and the solutions will appear. But even that, in itself, isn't the whole answer.
In addition to having less reason to worry, you will be better able to accept a reasonable amount of uncertainty in your life, without this becomeing a threat. In fact, I can say this with certainty, the quality of your life is directly proportional to the amount of uncertainty you can safely life with. And, that goes for everybody.
The future is uncertain, the path is not set, but the worrier attempts to gain a degree of control over the future by worrying. They con themselves into believing that by worrying they have control over the future. But this is not true at all, it is an illusion.
As the future unfolds by presenting the worrier with surprises (unpleasant as well as pleasant), events and outcomes, it is important to realize these are only ever resolved by taking action, after considered judgement, not by worry. But the worrier is so entrenched in the belief that to worry is the solution, they very often miss out on enjoying the good things that the future will also bring, because they can't allow themselves to enjoy the good things. Something may go wrong to screw it up, so the doubt and worry process starts all over again.
One person said; I worry so much it's like asking for trouble. And, this brings us back to the idea that you are pressurized by, and manifest, what you think about, most of the time. So if you constantly have your attention and worry focused on your failing finances, your worsening health, your job prospects, you're almost guaranteed to make them worse, or at the very least bring them to fruition. Remember, you become what you think about most of the time.
If you are worried that you worry too much, then you're right to worry. However, as there's no future in worrying, then learn to relax, let the worry fade away and then allow your super conscious mind to do the work it was designed to do and solve your problems. If you would like to learn some tools to help you worry less and increase your productivity, then take action; use the email address below to book yourself a skype session and let's get started.