Find Emotional Freedom from Jealousy. Skype Video Online Counselling and Therapy for Jealousy
How does jealousy show up in YOUR life? Who gets hurt when you are jealous?
Jealousy can cause a lot of pain in your life
Jealousy drives me and everyone around me CRAZY!
Feeling jealous brings out the Green Eyed Monster in me
Jealousy runs your life (and ultimately ruins your life)
Jealousy creates feelings of insecurity
Jealous feelings have shrunk my world to specific, painful moments in time
Jealousy drives feelings of anxiety and stress
Jealousy can cause depression and paranoia
Jealousy comes from not getting your human needs met. We'll talk more about this when you have your Skype session, but essentially, it is not meeting your physical and spiritual requirements of, certainty, uncertainty, connection/love, significance, contribution and growth.
There will be times when you judge yourself, or feel judged by others, and know that you don't give of your best. Jealousy is exhausting, generates pain, both mental and physical, creates depression, doubt, and is centred very heavily around feelings of anxiety. In the end, jealousy runs your life and can leave you with intense pain!
The pain comes from giving someone else ALL THE POWER! What does this mean? If you are constantly worrying about what someone else is doing, you are constantly hurting, and feel powerless over the actions of others. This is not very attractive in any relationship, and actually allows rot to set in. You are wasting so much time and energy when you display jealousy, that it literally feeds on your insecurities; you need to blame someone else and walk on egg shells, creating negativity and confusion.
It's not so clever for the partner of a jealous person either. You become hypervigilant, all the time looking to do the right thing so as not to set off your partners suspicions or jealous rages. How much energy do you think it takes to complete these tasks every day? This is energy that both of you are squandering and not giving to the relationship. Can you just imagine what kind of relationship you would have if all that energy, now used in a negative way, was switched to support and grow the relationship? How much more fulfilling would that be?
Is there a difference between envy and jealousy?
Yes. Envy is when your partner, or a whole bunch of people are doing something that you want to do. So the idea here is, 'What about me? Why can't I do that too?' Jealousy is when your partner is doing something with other people and you want him/her out of there, and having fun with you, not with those other people. Also, jealousy is when your partner is talking, joking or laughing with someone else and you feel threatened by that because you haven't been included or you feel your partner should be talking to you, not with this other person.
Either way the only person that can change the way you feel about your situation, is YOU!
Learn how to redirect your envy using EFT and avoid the triggers that set off your jealousy, and to deal with your jealousy at the point of origin. Jealousy is just a signal that you feel powerless and not getting your needs met. This is why so many people with jealousy find it near impossible to admit their jealousy. It's like admitting there is something wrong, and therefore I must be weak, or a bad person.
When you get your needs met first, jealousy doesn't have a chance to kick off. Jealousy by itself is not a relationship destroyer. Of course, it will eventually, if you don't address it. But try to see jealousy as an indication that something is wrong and your needs aren't being met in the way that you think they should be. By using jealousy as the signal that your needs aren't being met, you have a basis for discussion with your partner.
Stop the jealousy train and GET OFF!
Exploring your reasons for your jealousy will give you some new insights into what is possible for you. The fact is, for some people jealousy has become a way of life for them, that is driving everyone around them crazy. What would be the advantages of looking at this and addressing the issue? Because it really would make a difference in your life, and the life of everyone around you. Jealousy erodes the trust and confidence others have in you, it destroys your self-esteem, your self-confidence, your self-worth, which can lead to a multitude of other health problems, or the loss of an important relationship.
Arm yourself with the tools that will give you the opportunity to identify when jealousy is raising its ugly head, when it's changing your body chemistry, when your imagination takes over the conversation and actions of what you think is going on in your partner at that moment. Know that you will have trained yourself to handle the jealousy, and so you can reverse it in an instant. When your mind sees you are no longer under threat, or attack all the time, the jealousy response will start to dissipate and slow down. Any remaining jealousy that doesn't can be taken care of quite easily. If you can relate to any of this and you have frequent bouts of jealousy, then please use the email address below.